-sighs-

here we go
thanks to susan for making me all depressed.


so...here's the thing. i have a lot of friends. but do any of you really understand me? do you know the reason behind every word i say, every tear i cry, every smile i...well smile? you might think you understand me. and some of you guys kinda do. but i don't think anybody knows everything that i'm thinking and the reasoning behind it. sometimes, i don't even know myself. i'm constantly changing, and i just can't keep up.

a lot of you guys know portions of me. you all have different pieces of the puzzle. you just haven't put it together. do any of you know the story of my life? no. but everybody knows a little bit.
sometimes i just feel so alone and left out. like you guys don't care about me. i know you do, but it's just a state of mind. and it's a very convincing state of mind.

and then my parentals are making me stressed over "the future" who gives a crap about college anyway? it's in 4 stinkin years. think about all the fun i can have? but no, i have to worry about SATs and GPAs and ACTs and all those other acronyms that i don't want to think up right now.

and i moved a lot when i was younger right? so now that i've finally been at a school long enough to actually assosciate some memories with it, i'm leaving. and it's symbolic. i feel like i'm leaving my childhood. seeing as i moved a lot, i had to grow up fast. and now that i can finally be crazy again, it's fading away. it's all slipping away, and i can't hold on to it.

and i'm just so confused...about everything. my reasons for living, who i am, friends, school, the general meaning of life. my future's so far away. and yet, tomorrow is closer than yesterday will ever be.

okay. i'm good. i originally planned on doing more but...i already let off a lot of steam.
now i can be happy again. just needed to get that off my back.
see you guys tom. :)

-Quiverz